July 2012
213 posts
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I hope Rick Santorum goes to make a sandwich for a midnight snack, only to find that he is out of bread.
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ihopemittromney:
I hope Mitt Romney goes overseas and says some insensitive things about the London Games and it cause an international snafu that harms his international credibility and-OH WAIT
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I hope Rick Santorum’s internet isn’t fast enough to stream the Olympics live, so he has to wait until the evening to watch the events, but his friends on facebook spoiled that Ryan Lochte won and Michael Phelps didn’t win a medal
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i hope rick santorum missed Ryan Lochte’s gold medal swim so he doesn’t get to talk about how amazing it was.
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I hope Rick Santorum gets a tiny piece of tissue stuck in his eye after trying to remove eyeliner.
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ihopemittromney:
i hope mitt romney gets strapped to the roof of his car the next time he goes on a road trip.
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Watchihopemittromney:
Yo momma’s pudgy, face it.
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I hope Rick Santorum overhears people excitedly discussing the very movie he was planning to see.
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holy shit ryan lochte just blew michael phelps out the water
I hope Rick Santorum falls asleep while tanning at the beach and nobody wakes him up, so he ends up with a sunburn on half of his body.
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I hope Rick Santorum’s piece of confetti at the Olympics accidentally falls into an open flame and burns.
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I hope Rick Santorum is eating at Chick-fil-A and gets that weird part of the chicken and bites down on the cartilage.
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pinkglitterandhorror-deactivate asked: thank you for your blog or i would know nothing besides whats happening in my bedroom and refrigerator.
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punkiraq asked: You should make an "IHopeMittRomney" blog.
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Some people are actually voting for Mitt Romney. Let that thought sizzle in your head for a little.
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I hope Rick Santorum goes into work on a casual Friday wearing crocs and is the only one wearing casual clothes.
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I hope Rick Santorum goes kayaking and gets seduced by a mystical river mermaid out on the water, then it turns out to be Nicolas Cage in drag.
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i hope rick santorum gets stuck in the labyrinth and doesn’t know where to go so a caterpillar tells him to walk into the ‘wall’ to turn BUT IT’S ACTUALLY A WALL
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I hope Rick Santorum’s mother finds his Tumblr.
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I hope Rick Santorum gets up at 5:00 AM for his morning class and his professor doesn’t show up.
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come to tiny chat with me →
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I hope Rick Santorum gets a popcorn kernel stuck in his teeth and can never get it out.
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I hope Rick Santorum plays Robot Unicorn Attack and his dreams never come true.
chekhov:
mitt romney is the dad that acts weird around his son’s black friends
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I hope Rick Santorum submits a funny thing to Tumblr but it never gets posted because it was an inside joke that he figured everyone would understand.
Guns don’t kill people. Movies do. Yes, of course. Smoking doesn’t kill people either, advertisements do. Drunk driving doesn’t kill people, car dealerships do.
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N.R.A. Proposes Sweeping Ban on Movies →
Tracy Klugian, an official spokesperson for the gun-lobbying organization, said that the N.R.A. had taken this extraordinary step because it “could not stand idly by and watch movies tear apart the fabric of our civil society.” All in all, the N.R.A.’s Klugian said he was “cautiously optimistic” that the organization’s call for new legislation would be heeded “because our message finally...
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I hope Rick Santorum spends hours looking for diamonds in Minecraft and just when he finds and mines them, he falls into lava and loses everything.
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I hope Rick Santorum applies for NYADA and absolutely kills his audition but then his best friend who choked her audition gets in and he doesn’t
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I hope Rick Santorum plants a garden and nothing comes up.
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I hope Rick Santorum’s soda goes flat before he finishes it.
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Who wants a free guitar lesson?
apolyphonicorchestra:
Add me on Skype: mouldy.teabags I lost my pub job today, and I need to fill my time until I find another job! I have been teaching guitar and music theory to beginners for about a year and a half and because of where I live, there are hardly any people to teach.
Citizens of tumblr! I am offering FREE guitar lessons - because I’m kind and bored, not because I’m shit. I can...
i hope rick santorum eats bad mexican food shortly before going into a very important meeting.
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I hope Rick Santorum gets a horrible toothache right in the middle of eating some delicious pizza.
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I hope Rick Santorum gets a t-shirt from a band he doesn’t listen to in hopes of looking cool but when he can’t name any songs by them he is exposed as a fraud.
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I hope Rick Santorum sees that Starkid is doing a reading of AVPSY and he can’t go to leakycon.
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I hope Rick Santorum grows a goatee so he and Ryan Howard can be Goatee Brothers, but then Ryan gets creeped out and shaves his goatee, making Rick look stupid.
i hope rick santorum tries to go to the midnight premier of the dark knight rises but all the tickets are sold out
