I hope Rick Santorum has a crush on a girl and she asks him to help her pick out some lingerie for a date, and so he helps her out, thinking she means the date and lingerie will be for him, but it’s for someone else instead.
I hope Rick Santorum steps out of the shower only to realize that he still has soap on his toes.
I hope Rick Santorum is the weakest person in his marching band, but ends up having to march with the biggest, heaviest bass drum and is sore for days afterward.
I hope Rick Santorum glues a poster on his wall, and when it was time to take off the poster, the paint of his wall came off.
I hope Rick Santorum finds this blog and cries himself to sleep.
My idiotic brother took the reins of my account previously. If anyone got any hate msgs or anything along that nature, I apologize.
I hope Rick Santorum always gets rushed out restaurants, even if he’s the only one there.
I hope Rick Santorum plans to take a nice vacation but gets sick right before it.
I hope Rick Santorum shaves his head and no one posts a “Leave Rick Alone” video.
I hope Rick Santorum decided to play Animal Crossing: Wild World after a month of inactivity, and he finds his town empty and covered in weeds and he gets a visit from Resetti because he forgot to save his game last time.
I hope Rick Santorum is Sent to the moon by princess Celestia (Trollestia)
I hope that after Rick Santorum’s neopets get blasted by the snowager, he doesn’t even get the avatar.
I hope that Rick Santorum makes an account on neopets with a mildly inappropriate name as a joke, but then he actually starts to play and he starts to get emotionally attached to all of his neopets and he manages to paint all of them, but then one day he comes back to find out that the mods shut his account down because of his name and now he’s lost everything.
I hope Rick Santorum gets caught cheating on a final
I hope Rick Santorum gets asked to prom, but later finds out it was a prank.
I hope Rick Santorum posts a nude “in the mirror” bathroom iPhone pic of himself on tumblr but gets no “LIKES.”
I hope Rick Santorum buys a new ipod and when he goes to sync it, it erases all of his songs from itunes.